How are You?
I am asked often, “How are you doing?” My most frequent response is, “It varies from day-to-day.” I find myself going about life and then it will hit me and it is all so fresh and painful again. I recently went back to work and I find myself thinking often about talking something over with Dennis when I get home only to remember he won’t be there. I miss that day-to-day interaction the most. As time has passed, I find myself more and more lonely while at the same time having to pick-up and go on. It is a strange place to be in life.
Brooklyn is doing well but misses her daddy a lot too. We talk about him and at times that is easy and at other times it is difficult. Both of us journal and that is helping us too. I think Brooklyn describes it well when she says, “I just don’t feel right.” It will take time to adjust and there will always be a huge hole in our hearts.
Am I Enough?
This, by no means, means I don’t miss Dennis or wish we could have grown old together. I will miss him every day until we are once again reunited in eternity. It is helping me to live expectantly for what is ahead. I do not want to live like the best part of my life is over and only look backward. I will always cherish the years we had together but I am also choosing to look ahead with faith that God has much in store for me in the years ahead. I have seen Him work in miraculous ways during Dennis’ illness and I can hardly wait to see what God has in store for the future.
Is God enough? Yes, a thousand times yes!